Leadership is About Love

"And in the end, the love you get is equal to the love you give." Lennon-McCartney

Our client focus groups are telling us that the purpose of leadership vital to “building organizational capability” is not just about achieving business aspirations. In fact, talking with diverse groups of professionals, managers, and executives, people are saying in essence, “leadership is about love.”

There is a strong correlation between how leadership is perceived and given definition, and how people experience the state and ways of being in love. Traditional leadership tends to be authoritarian (some might say fascist) based on title and position within the hierarchy. Have ever you met anyone who was coerced into a loving relationship?

When you think about it, leadership and love are mutually inclusive. Creating mutual trust, value, respect, and acceptance, a shared vision and mission with another human being, a sincere commitment that doesn’t fade away when the sky isn’t blue. There is no absence of clarity, no ambivalence.

Think deeper, no time for hesitation, immerse yourself in the love pool. Leaders who have high emotional intelligence (EQ) are accessible, followers are believing with eyes wide open. Leadership is About Love. Here is a list our findings, and related notations:

  • Enlightened (seeing what others can’t see)
  • Emotional Intelligence (High EQ)
  • Caring (giving of themselves)
  • Willingness to partner (and collaborate)
  • Willingness to change behavior
  • Nurturing Relationship(s)
  • Genuinely committed to relationship(s)
  • Resilient
  • Pluralistic (and inclusive)
  • Thought-provoking
  • Inspire Action
  • Coach for optimum performance
  • Mutually Adaptive
  • Open Minded: Receptive to Multiple Pluralistic Perspectives
  • Open Hearted (Actually Give a Damn)
  • Being Generous (without expectations)
  • Admirable
  • Trustworthy
  • Ethically Driven
  • Thoughtful Listener and Observer
  • Creatively and Strategically Balanced
  • Do as they say (follow-through)
  • Authentic
  • Lead by Example
  • High Self-Awareness
  • Appreciative
  • Empathic

Why is this important? Consider this, “Enlightened Leaders” (who possess High EQ) are directly linked to individual, team, organizational, and business success.

Yet, research has shown that emotional intelligence is not valued in mainstream business, and EQ dramatically declines within more senior management and executive groups. Despite EQ being introduced years ago, the problem remains: how to increase Emotional Intelligence (we can call it “the love factor”) within the highest organizational levels.

The vast rejection of Emotional Intelligence by most of Corporate America is even more astounding when considering that organizations are comprised of human beings (with emotions!). It’s as if the soft skills have been purposely devalued to divert attention away from this fact: developing High EQ is hard for most “leaders” because of cultural, societal, and business-orientation.

Remember, Enlightened Leadership with High EQ can create new waves of understanding, and  innovative organizational solutions.

The beginning is always today. Let’s continue the conversation.

  • What do you think the correlation is between love and leadership? Why do you think it matters?
  • What is your definition of love?
  • What is your definition of leadership?
  • Are you an enlightened leader?
  • What do you think the correlation is between emotional intelligence and success? Why do you think it matters?

Marc Ortiz de Candia, Executive Partner, Vitalia Consulting